Well folks, we have started off the New Year with a bang...or is it a bong? The MLS and the Real Estate ads are teeming with hilarious misspellings and bizarre descriptions. I suspect we will have a year full of delicious faux pas. (I suppose that would that be written as Fox Paws in MLS-speak.) Please enjoy:
SALES PITCHES RUN AMUCK:
"Kitchen with trash contractor" (For those who want to buy a dump...)
"Wine seller in basement" (Does anyone know he's missing?)
"Must submit proof of funs" (How ‘bout a photo of me on a ferris wheel?)
"Status reneged daily" (Please s__t or get off the pot...)
"Dank hardwood floors thrugout" (Offered by Smelly McSpelly)
"Full frontal and back landscaping" (Calling Dr. Freud...)
"Gracias living space" (Ole'!)
"244 hr notice required - Hurry - will go fast!" (Frankly, I think it's going nowhere.)
KINKY AND STINKY
"Stunning hurse ranch" (We wrangle the dead)
"Canceled - seller says small gas problem" (It's only small when you're not on the receiving end, pal.)
"Master dick overlooks fountain" (OMG - even I won't go there!)
"Tandem area - bedroom option" (How kinky-dink!)
"Large kitchen offers fever views" (Starve a fever, feed a cold.)
"You'll be peasantly surprised" (So was Marie Antoinette...)
"Only beast materials used" (Note to self: "Call PETA and keep my dog close.)
"Two story turkey home" (That's called a poultry farm, bozo...)
"Call for HO and assessment info" (Or just cruise down Hollywood Blvd....)
AND THEY JUST KEEP COMING...
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