Friday, March 11, 2011

Has Real Estate Gone To The Dogs?

Do you remember the terrible moment in baseball at Shea Stadium in 1986 when the Red Sox World Series win went between Bill Buckner’s legs?

It was Game 6, Red Sox vs. Mets, and the Sox were up three games to two, leading 5-3 with two outs in the bottom of the 10th. Then, the Mets scored three singles. Mookie Wilson hit a grounder to Bill Buckner at first, and the ball went right through his legs , allowing the winning run. It was a sad, sad moment in baseball, friends. And there were some sad moments in the MLS again this week – wild pitches and blatant fouls that could rival Buckner’s famous gaff:

Let The Game Begin
“Patio doors has built-in blonds” (So does the Sigma Chi house at UCLA.)

“FP has gas and legs” (So does my Uncle Paddy, and he’s usually lit, too.)

“Picturass setting” (Okay…I am picturing my a__ on a beach tossing down the margaritas.)

Who’s On First?
“Slider stuck butt open” (Uh, maybe you should see a proctologist about that.)

“Drawing 4 Tickets for Super Bowel” (This explains the “stuck butt open.”)

“Garage with auto open. Remote is lost, door won’t open. Can open. Now closed.” (Can anyone say “schizophrenia”?)

“Window w/ broads will be replaced” (This must be the Sigma Chi house again…)

Bench That Dude!

“Bar and Murphy bled in basement” (Ouch – did Murphy get drunk fall off a bar stool like Uncle Paddy?)

“Rose gardeng in back” (Rose must be a Rottweiler.)

“New guts & rain-chains everywhere” (I believe that’s called lap-band surgery)

“Open Canceled- jersy duty” (Yeah, everyone does time in Jersey sooner or later…)

Three Strikes And You’re Out, Pal!

“Tenants movement scheduled.” (There’s certainly something to be said for being regular…)

“Safe, quiet street to love on” (I wish I had known about this place in high school…)

“Top-end Fridgidhare appliances” (Have the hares tried Viagra?)
And For The Nose Bleed Section

“Turn right, drownhill from thare” (A bit like your career, huh?)

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